Things I’m Pondering

I’ve been MIA here of late and I apologize. My priorities are being pulled in multiple directions at the moment and stopping to write hasn’t been something I’ve been able to do.
While I usually come to you with fully formed ideas and solutions, today I’m going to share with you things I’m cogitating on.
I’ve recently subscribed to The Daily Stoic. A few days ago this quote landed in my inbox:
“He heard the warning of Marcus Aurelius; cease to be whirled about; and of Baudelaire: ‘Pleasure consumes us, work strengthens us. Let us choose.’”
It’s from Budd Schulberg’s novel about his time with F. Scott Fitzgerald. I keep coming back to it a couple times a day, turning it over and over in my mind. The rebel in me immediately said “All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy” but I KNOW that the point of the warning contained in that quote isn’t to abstain from pleasure, it’s to not be LED by it.
Time has been a serious pain point for me of late. Without going into too much detail, I’m in a spot where I need to stop doing some things so that I have time to do other things, except that I cannot stop doing said things because I don’t have what doing the things I want to do would bring me. Time has become something so elusive and precious. The reality is that it is THE only non-renewable resource we have. And when we don’t have enough of it, we suffer. One of the things I’ve finally realized though is that instead of reinforcing that I don’t have time, I’m reminding myself that I DO have time. I have enough time.
I have enough of everything I need. And so do you. We always do and always will.

What Does “Enough” Mean?

What does %22enough%22 mean to you?

“Too often I see people focusing so hard on the final outcome (lose 10 pounds, squat 200, make six figures) and not enough on the process, the things they can control in the moment, right now. Then they become disappointed when the outcome takes longer to achieve than planned.” Steph Gaudreau

Steph Gaudreau, the woman behind Stupid Easy Paleo and the podcast Harder to Kill Radio, is one of my favorite people I’ve never met. She’s about as real as they come, isn’t afraid to rock the boat but isn’t controversial for the sake of controversy, and is PASSIONATE about teaching women the gift of strong bodies. I seriously can’t wait to meet her one day.

The above quote was taken from a video she posted sometime last week and that line smacked me in the forehead. It was one more nudge in a series of nudges I’ve had this year to scale back, stop chasing the future, stop chasing a body fat percentage, stop chasing the if/then or when/then. Silly me, I reached the “feel better” part of (or so I thought) of the mantra that got me started me and kept me on this path for the better part of 2 years and somehow forgot that just being off all of the medications wasn’t really the benchmark I thought I wanted.

Around the same time Steph posted that video, I got into a conversation with a friend and client around what “enough” means. Those two might seem like unrelated events, but bear with me.

Something I’ve realized in the past handful of months is that when all of the mud and muck are washed away, everything comes down to “enough” for me. Scarcity is a concept I grew up with and no matter how I try, it’s turning out to be harder to shake than I ever could have imagined. So this conversation about “enough” came down to this question: What does “I am enough” mean to me?

  • I feed my body in a way that is supportive of it’s needs
  • I move my body in ways that support it’s strength, it’s flexibility, it’s hormonal balance, and with the intent that I NOT require assistance in my old age
  • I am mindful of my emotions and my thoughts
  • I nurture my relationships and build strong social connections because I require that in order to thrive
  • I do things that scare me
  • I laugh daily
  • I know my value and the value of what I bring to the world

If you look closely, you’ll see that these actions are all process. They are the process behind the life I want to live. They are the path, the road, the map, whatever you want to call it. They are actions for the sake of themselves – like exercise for the sake of exercise instead of as a means of self-abuse, numbing, or avoidance.

This doesn’t mean don’t have goals, aspirations, or dreams. Quite the contrary. To paraphrase The Cheshire Cat, any road is good if you don’t know where you are going. You MUST know what you want in order to figure out what the path is. It’s a non-negotiable of a thriving life. The big lesson here is that knowing what you want isn’t enough. Yes, sometimes you can get there by just taking the next best step. As a matter of fact, I’ve used that method with great success. But consider this the set it and forget it method: know exactly what you want, then forget about it and focus on the process. Get so good at the process that you effortlessly replicate it. Get so good at the process that you won’t have to worry about how you keep whatever it is you wanted because you’ll just keep doing what you were doing. Get so good at the process that 50 years from now you have no regrets over having not done something because the process gave you the life you wanted to live.

Your turn: I’d love to hear what your version of “enough” includes. Post a comment here or jump over to the Facebook page and comment there, I’d love to hear from you.

Where are you struggling in your life right now? How can I help you? Whether you are looking for feedback on a some changes you might make to your diet or are looking for longer term accountability as you tackle some big things, I offer one on one coaching options that suit your needs. Click here to schedule your session and get started creating your amazing life.